The Hall Of Names In This Year’s MLB Draft

The MLB Draft concludedon July 13, hours before the All-Star Game. With 20 rounds and 612 picks in total, nearly every player is just a name on the screen to the serious observer, let alone the average fan. Beyond looking at who my favorite team selects, I enjoy finding the most exciting and unusual names to stay invested in the late rounds. If you also like rooting for players like OF Coco Crisp, then this list is for you. Here are the 10 players with the best names in the 2021 MLB Draft.

10. SS Max Muncy, Thousand Oaks High School

You read that right. Max Muncy was drafted this year. No, he is not the same guy as the Los Angeles Dodgers first baseman. I wouldn’t blame you if you thought so, though, because the Oakland A’s drafted both of them. Even crazier, the two Muncys share the same birthday! Perhaps they are variants of each other now that the multiverse exists. The Dodgers Muncy is ahead in his career, but the younger one has the All-Star beat on draft day, as the high schooler went 25th overall.

9. LHP Gage Jump, JSerra Catholic High School

Jump would be much higher on my list, but it is doubtful he signs in the 18th round since he is a top-two-round prospect. That means we will hear from him in the draft three years from now, but we can still enjoy his name in the meantime. Gage Jump is my favorite kind of name because he has two words in there. The headlines write themselves: “Gage Jump-starts his teammates,” “time to en-Gage!” “Gage Jumps for joy!” The San Diego Padres got this stud, but they will have to pay him many millions to skip college.

8. LHP Rohan Handa, Yale University

The pleasant repetition in Handa’s name earns him a spot on this coveted list. Plus, Handa is of Indian descent, so it is fantastic to see more draft picks from different backgrounds. Like all of Yale’s overachievers, Handa has plenty of impressive extracurriculars beyond excelling at baseball. According to his university’s biography, he is a math, Mandarin and orchestra club member, and he plays viola. The San Francisco Giants took him in the fifth round. What did you do at 21 years old?

7. 2B Dayton Dooney, Central Arizona College

Ding, ding, ding! We have found the player who sounds the most like a fictional character! There are a handful of draft picks with alliterative, quirky names, but Dooney has the best one. His first name is really a last name, a classic trope for an eccentric protagonist. Dooney is only one letter off from captaining the Toon Squad, so he will be a favorite with little kids. Maybe he will be the captain of the Kansas City Royals someday, who took him in the sixth round.

6. RHP Brandon Birdsell, Texas Tech University

Brandon is a common name, but Birdsell is an all-timer. He has two words in his last name, and they rarely go together otherwise. It wasn’t good enough to just be named Bird or Sell; Brandon had to have both together. Does he sell birds? I highly doubt it, but he sells his breaking ball to hitters. The Minnesota Twins took the junior in the 11th round, so it would not shock me if Birdsell goes back for a senior season to raise his stock.

5. RHP Kumar Rocker, Vanderbilt University

The most famous player on the list, Kumar can rock a roster sheet and opposing lineups. Thankfully not named after a subpar comedy franchise, Rocker has two great names. His first and last names are each great individually, and they flow well together. Rocker also has professional genes, as his dad played in the NFL. Rocker slipped a little bit in the draft, but the New York Mets are hoping he refinds his no-hitter magic. Tenth overall is a total steal for such a talented pitcher.

4. RHP Alaska Abney, Coastal Carolina University

Plenty of states and countries show up in many names, but have you ever heard of Alaska as a first name? I certainly haven’t, but Alaska Abney will do his best to make sure fans know who he is. The new partner in crime for Carmen San Diego, Abney will likely improve in a strong pitching development system with the Cleveland Indians. After going in the 15th round, Abney might become another late-round star in Ohio like SP Shane Bieber and SP Zach Plesac.

3. RHP Wyatt Olds, The University of Oklahoma

If being Old wasn’t enough, Wyatt’s family is full of Olds people. I guarantee you they still drive an Oldsmobile, probably a few of them. Despite his last name, Wyatt is not old in years. He finished his junior year of college, and he is two months younger than me. Olds went in the seventh round to the Boston Red Sox, and Boston is a city filled with old history. We love our old stuff here, so Wyatt will fit right in.

2. OF River Town, Dallas Baptist University

Two-word name alert! Not only are river and town both words, but they are nouns that go together. “River Town” sounds more like a real-life description than a person’s name, but that makes him easy to root for. Even better, Dallas is on a river, as the Trinity River flows through the town. The Kansas City Royals took Town in the 15th round, and Kansas City connects to the Missouri River. I think it is safe to say that wherever Town plays, he will be playing in a river town.

1. RHP Owen Sharts, University of Nevada

Do I have to spell this one out for you?

These are the All-Stars of the 2021 draft. Congratulations to each of the 612 players who accomplished their dreams of being drafted. Hopefully, sooner rather than later, fans will be able to see these names on the back of a jersey, have a good laugh, then be in aw as the next generation of superstars achieves magnificent feats.

Cover photo courtesy of Paul Rodriguez/The Orange County Register