The Worst Fan Gear In The MLB Shop

Don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing I love more than supporting and showing off my favorite baseball team with their merch. However, if the MLB Shop wants my business anytime soon, they’re going to have to step it up a few notches. If you’re unaware of some of the hideous products that MLBShop.com has to offer, let me enlighten you! Ponder no further, here are the most horrendous MLB fan gear products known to mankind.

The Purse

The fact that this tacky purse is almost $300 absolutely blows my mind. Also, the description says it is nearly sold out; who is buying this? I have never heard of the brand, and I am quite the purse enthusiast, so my eyebrow is raised at the price again. Based on the fact that it could probably only hold my phone and a chapstick because it is so tiny, what about it makes it $300? But enough of the functionality aspect, let’s talk about its appearance. 

No offense to anyone who owns this accessory, but I genuinely believe this has to be one of the ugliest purses I have ever laid eyes on. The brown leather accent of the straps and zippers is something I despise. It completely clashes with the baseball designs and the bright blue color. If I were the designer, I would have opted for an all-white leather rather than throwing in oaky auburn where it does not need to be. Now you may be wondering, how much would I pay for this purse? Let’s put it this way. They would have to pay me. Oh, and FYI, avoid the entire purse section. You will be highly disappointed; trust me, they’re all a letdown.

The Skirt

This skirt just needs to go. I am honestly starting to question who is approving these designs because they keep getting worse and worse as I browse their selections. The color, argyle and obnoxious logo are a total mess. Let’s start with the color. Typically, the colors blue, yellow and orange could work well together, as it does on a Miami Marlins hat or jersey. But on a skirt? It’s just not a good look. 

Now let’s dig into the pattern on the skirt. I get that the argyle-type triangle pattern is making a comeback, and it’s super cute on any other skirt, except this one. It looks like something my mom would wear if she were trying to fit in because the in-style concept is there, but the execution is garbage. Not to mention the vast Marlins logos plastered all over it makes it way too messy. But we can’t forget another significant factor: the price, which is a cool $125. So again, we see another overpriced piece of fan gear that is hideous. Like I said before, you would have to pay me to wear this.

The Dog Toy

If you were hoping to get your furry friend something fun to rally behind your team, you came to the wrong place! I’ll admit, from first glance, they’re not terrible. A baseball with a rope through it and the team logo plastered on a fluffy baseball. Simple. But that’s the problem! I have seen this done dozens of times, for a fraction of the price! It is just too basic for my liking. My puppy deserves a cute chew toy, and this just doesn’t cut it. Also, I can’t speak from personal experience, but these don’t exactly look the most durable either. I would be willing to bet this lasts for a week tops before my dog turns it to shreds. The worst part is, I guarantee it’s filled with that annoying white stuffing that is impossible to get rid of when your three-year-old rottweiler scatters it around the house. Okay, that is from personal experience. Overall, this design is just lame, and my doggo couldn’t agree more.

False Advertisement

I’m just going to let this one speak for itself; I don’t care if it’s been four years. I’m not letting it go. The Houston Astros cheated, and their merchandise promoting their World Series championship is nothing more than false advertising. In fact, I am surprised they’re still selling Astros 2017 World Series merchandise at all, despite everything. But hey, to each their own. I’m not the only one who has to put an embarrassing home plate plaque in their living room that might as well say “2017 World Series Cheaters.”

The Crew Neck Sweater

Last but not least, let’s talk about this sweater. I know what you’re thinking. “Hannah, don’t you know that ugly Christmas sweaters are trendy?” Yes, I do. But I don’t think this is one of those ironic statements.

First and foremost, it is 100% polyester. Now, I could’ve left it there, and it would’ve been the only reason I need to declare this as one of the worst items in the shop. But I have more. Contrary to popular belief, I love the Oakland A’s green and yellow. I think they pair with each other so nicely on their jerseys, but this is just something else. The green is too bright, and the random beige color bothers me. I will say, I do like the lettering of “Oakland” — it reminds me of those “welcome to” city murals or the back of a postcard. But despite the lettering being cool, the gigantic baseball smack dab in the middle with the A’s logo just really rubs me the wrong way. Although this is not one of those cute ugly Christmas sweaters, this fits the bill if you are looking for a literal ugly Christmas sweater!

The Conclusion

As a longtime customer of the MLB Shop, I think it is pretty clear why the products above made it into the “worst fan gear” category. I can’t deny that most of their products are super cute, and they have a ton of great choices for everyone. I even saw a Christmas tree topper! However, that doesn’t mean there isn’t room for improvement and new designs.

On another note, there are many fantastic small businesses on Etsy and Instagram with so many excellent products, so I encourage everyone to check those out too! All in all, I know I said they have to step it up to get my business anytime soon, but during my search for the worst products, I, of course, found some items to add to my collection. So with that being said, I know the perfect way to spend this Monday: with some retail therapy!