When Heather Met Corey — An Almost Dodger Love Story

So Valentine’s Day was yesterday, and for some of us, that meant being showered with love and chocolates and presents and affection. For others — namely your good ol’ pal Dodger Girl — it meant being reminded once again that, in fact, romance is not to be had, is nowhere to be seen and may never come to fruition. If you’re like me and are as single and unwanted as the last orange Flintstones vitamin in the bottle, allow me to transport you to a world where true love is always in sight, broken hearts are always mended and everyone gets their happy ending. That’s right, today we’re clearing away our tear-filled tissues and Cheeto-stained sweatpants for a story that’s better than any diamond ring or champagne-soaked romance. The tale in question: my very real, not-at-all embellished run-in with Dodger Adonis SS Corey Seager, and how a smile and a wave turned into so much more. Sorry When Harry Met Sally… and The Notebook — your time is done.

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Once upon a time, in the far-away land of Glendale, Arizona, sat a beautiful ballpark in the sprawling countryside of Camelback Ranch. There, the local townspeople and visitors from other lands would congregate to watch the great game of baseball with their kinfolk, companions and fellow fanatics. But this wasn’t just any baseball — nay, this was special baseball, in which spectators could observe their favorite players and teams from villages near and far compete with each other before the regular season commenced. Because the scores of these games didn’t count, those witnessing this athletic display could enjoy the games without fear of disappointing results. So, as the flowers bloomed, global pandemics were still only a distant concern and the chill of winter gave way to spring’s mirth and merriment, pre-season baseball commenced, and all were content.

One day, as she was driving home from an evening of combat training known as “kickboxing,” Heather received the most joyful surprise: she was to traverse the hazardous terrain of the Fifth freeway with her kinfolk to attend a weekend of this exclusive Spring Training. She was overwhelmed with glee, as she rushed home to pack her away bag and prepare herself for what would be a dream come true. For not only did she love this game of baseball, but she knew that her long sought-after love would be playing in these games — outfielder extraordinaire and defending Most Valuable Of All The Players Cody James Bellinger. She had been itching to see Mr. Bellinger for many a fortnight (which was, coincidentally, also his favorite electronic game), and knowing that their long-awaited union was just around the corner, she could hardly contain herself. She knew that the moment they laid eyes on each other, they would fall in love and live happily ever after.

So off they went, Heather and Uncle and Cousin Misters Gilbert, on their arduous journey from Los Angeles, California to Glendale, Arizona. Having only stopped once for nourishment and refreshments, they made it to Camelback Ranch just in time to see the first pitch be thrown in front of 14,000 buzzing onlookers. Sitting just two rows behind home plate, Heather and Misters Gilbert were awe-strucketh by the beauty of the ballpark, the hulking figures of their favorite athletes and the glorious evening they had been fortunate enough to witness, as they were enveloped by pinkening skies and bright blue garments as far as the eye could see. Then, not long after the game had commenced, Heather saw him: Mr. Bellinger, as tall and handsome as she could have ever imagined. She yelled and screamed and gesticulated, “CODY, CODY, it’s me, your true love! Your betrothed! I have arrived at long last!” But alas, no response. Mr. Bellinger could not have been less intrigued by this romantic gesture, and as the game pressed on, Heather’s bluing soul was matched only by the blue in her thematic attire.

She watched on dejectedly, and as dusk fell she was prepared to once and for all refute the notion of true love. All of a sudden, however, another man appeared from the dugout: Corey Drew Seager. Heather had known of Mr. Seager previously — the gossip of the local townspeople was always a’flutter with tales of his wind-swept locks and his boyish charm. But Heather had always dismissed these rumors as superficial and insignificant, since, after all, her heart was set on one Mr. Bellinger. But sitting there, with Mr. Seager but mere centimeters away, she could see that the townspeople were right — this man not only rivaled Mr. Bellinger in athletic prowess, but in physical splendor as well, and Heather was immediately transfixed. Almost unconsciously, Heather once again began to yell and scream, “COREY, I love you! Let’s live happily ever after!”, and to her great astonishment, Mr. Seager turned around! Flashing her a stunning grin and a friendly wave, Heather’s blue soul returned to its familiar shade of red, and all those around her congratulated her on this wondrous event.

Before she knew it, however, the game was over. Mr. Seager had rejoined his teammates and Heather was unable to convene with him anymore that evening, nor for the rest of that weekend. Even so, she departed from Camelback Ranch at the conclusion of the games feeling a burgeoning hope. For Mr. Seager had noticed her, and as she believed in love at first sight, she knew that their saga was only beginning. So when the world shut down soon thereafter and all the townspeople grew ever more fearful of the insidious plague that had surrounded them, Heather’s interaction with Mr. Seager would carry her through those uncertain times until baseball resumed again.

Although delayed, baseball would grace televisions once more, and Heather watched all 60 regular-season games in anticipation of the ever-popular postseason tournament. The tournament eventually arrived, and for once, the Los Angeles Dodgers did not choke-eth. Heather witnessed with delight as one round after the other, the Dodgers defeated their opponents, even making the comeback of a lifetime by winning three elimination games in a row to secure the coveted Pennant. And who was the Most Valuable Of All The Players of that series? None other than the aforementioned Mr. Seager, who Heather had exchanged pleasantries with so long ago. And when the Los Angeles Dodgers reigned victorious on baseball’s biggest stage, who was awarded the Most Valuable Of All The Players for that World Series championship — the first in many moons for those Los Angeles Dodgers? Mr. Seager again. Heather knew in her heart that their exchange ages ago had led to that momentous occasion on the 27th of October in the year 2020, and she was elated for both Mr. Seager and all those involved in the organization. From that day forward, Heather understood that love impacts people in very different ways, and even if Heather and Mr. Seager were not meant to be together — he unfortunately wed his betrothed later that year — she knew that their brief interaction had catapulted Mr. Seager to success on the baseball field, and for that he would live on in Los Angeles glory forever after.

THE END

Cover photo courtesy of Heather Barette/All Talk, No Balk!